Power

As we struggle to understand women's relationship to priesthood, we sometimes equate priesthood to motherhood.  But fatherhood is the opposite number to motherhood.  The other day I was driving home from a Relief Society discussion and the obvious hit me.  Relief Society is the equal partner to Priesthood.  

(I see your eyes rolling -- but listen . . . )

A few months ago I read Aimee Molloy's book However Long the Night, about Molly Melching and her work in Senegal.  Molly Melching was a typical late 60s-early 70s college coed who ended up in Senegal and fell in love with the people.  She began by offering literacy classes to children in the capital city, which evolved into literacy classes for women in the capital, which evolved into discussion groups on literacy, health, welfare, and human rights with village women.  These small groups were extremely successful in creating positive change. This was not a top-down kind of "There is a better way and you must change."  This was a presenter saying, "Here is some new information.  Let's discuss this and see what you all feel about it."  Great change came out of these groups. One of the things that was powerful for these women was learning about the human rights specified in the United Nations declaration.  Understanding who they were was extremely empowering to women.  In one incident a young woman went home to her wife-beating husband and explained her new understanding to him.  He reported that he only beat her because that's what his father had taught him to do but when his wife explained how things could be different they tried it and "now we have a happy home" (a paraphrase of the husband's words). 

Several of the local women presenters wanted to discuss female genital cutting, which was common practice in Senegal at the time.  Molly Melching was afraid this would be perceived as a western influence (her) trying to tell another culture that what they were doing was wrong.  The local women were insistent, however.  This was a huge problem that affected the health and well-being of girls and women.  And so a discussion about this was tried out in one village.  Eventually it spread from village to village and within a few years female cutting was largely abandoned in Senegal.  (Efforts are continuing in it and other countries.  The lessons on literacy, health and personal rights are still the bedrock with this discussion as one of the lessons.) 

That is power.  And it is a model for power that we rarely think of--the power of meeting together, caring for each other and growing as we come to understand who we are and our potential. 

As all of this change was occurring a young scholar in Britain was astounded and contacted Melching to tell her that he had just finished doing a Master's Thesis on Alice Little, who long ago visited China and fell in love with the culture.  But she was interested in knowing what foot binding was all about and why it was practiced.  With the love and interest she displayed, women began talking about the practice, reexamining it.  They started small groups called "Natural Feet Societies" and within a decade or so the practice of foot binding was finally abandoned. 

After the groups in Senegal  were having a lot of success the government decided to outlaw female cutting.  This seems like a good thing, but it was a top-down way of using power.  People rebelled against it and hardened their positions.  It really set the work back for a while until the Tostan groups were able to get their message in.  

When women in Nauvoo wanted to organize to serve their communities Joseph Smith told them God had a better plan.  I've always shuddered at the description of being organized "under the priesthood" but thinking about it now (and thinking about priesthood as God's power and not the men who deliver that power) it seems amazing. ("Under the spotlights" doesn't have a negative connotation!)   This is an organization endowed with His power that uses one of the most powerful ways of influence on the earth. If understanding your rights as defined by the United Nations is powerful, how much more powerful is understanding your potential and rights as a daughter of God, inheritor of all that He has.  It is a truly mighty power entrusted to us by God himself. Additionally, the charity that is our motto and practice is one of the most powerful forces on earth. 

Pondering

Recent events in my church remind me of my teen years.  The Equal Rights Amendment was being debated throughout the United States.  It sounded wonderful.  I knew also that early women in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints had been suffragettes.

I had parents who felt and behaved as equals.  My mother had been a professional teacher for several years before her marriage and had become a professional mother.  My father had a career, but the major purpose of his work life seemed to be to support our family life and to help his extended family.  The idea that either of my parents was more important or more powerful was foreign to me.  “Not who’s right, but what’s right” was a family principle.  Faith in the Savior Jesus Christ, the perfect man who had humbly knelt to wash his disciples’ feet, filled our home.  

However, in the 1970s my church stated that it did not support the Equal Rights Amendment. I was confused.  Many arguments were advanced, but the only one that really made sense to me was that if women were considered completely equal under the law they would most likely be eligible for the draft.  (I didn’t even like PE class--or the idea of a mother going to war.)

I don’t know if it was just that idea or my personal relationship with God, but I kept pondering these things in my heart and while keeping my questions open aligned myself more with my church than the Equal Rights Amendment.

Looking back, I am grateful for both influences in my life.  The Equal Rights Amendment proponents made sure that I knew that I was every bit as capable and important as any man (something I had never doubted) and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints let me know that there were values more important than personal power and that I as a daughter of God and family ties were both eternally valuable. 

As a result of both these influences I have had a good life.  I stood my ground if anyone seemed to be encroaching on my free agency.  I married and had five marvelous children.  I enjoyed learning and exploring the world with my husband and these children. I kept involved enough in my profession to have a way back in when the time came. I developed new interests and kept up with current events. Of course, there were days of temper tantrums or chaos when I was discouraged and felt I wasn’t making any meaningful progress. My perpetually undone dishes are surely my passive aggressive “I’m too smart for housework” mentality.  Nevertheless, I was sustained by the knowledge that building a family was important. 

When all the world is running one direction, it is helpful to have some other points of view.  I am grateful that I had at least two points of view to triangulate from.  

If tomorrow the Prophet announces a revelation that the priesthood is given to all sexes, I'll be ready to serve. Right now, having a difference in tasks (not a difference in worth) within the church structure makes me think hard about what gender, equality, family, and power mean.  The debate makes me search the scriptures and seek out the Lord.  I'm still pondering.  I'm learning a lot along the way. 

Joy

I love the Book of Mormon.  It is quirky.  There are weird names and trying to understand the geography can give you a headache.  The book mentions horses when the geological record shows no horses in America until the Spanish monks and Conquistadors brought them. 

Nevertheless, I love this book.  My second son explained it in a way I can remember, “It is just good.” 

How would my life be different if I didn’t believe this book contained truth? 

There is one Book of Mormon scripture I could not live without. 

 “Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy.“ 

I cannot live without joy. 

I cannot live without the understanding that joy is important, vital, one of the very reasons for our existence. 

Sorrow is important too.  Another favorite scripture (this time from the Old Testament) is Psalms 30:5  “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.” 

One morning during one of the most despairing periods of my life I opened my front door to see frothy pink blossoms spilling all over the crab apple tree.  A feeling of peace came over me and a presence I have come to call the Holy Ghost whispered to me, “You are loved.  This is for you.”  

There are many things that can and will be said about joy and how to obtain it.  But I've said all I need to for now.  
Joy. 

 

Dancing Along the Rod of Iron

I believe.

I don't believe in fairies, although I'm glad that Beatrix Potter did.

I often believe six impossible things before breakfast (I will be on time to all my appointments, I will accomplish the things on my to-do list, I will not lose my temper...) 

I believe in good and evil and that good will eventually triumph.

I believe in a Higher Power, whom I call God.

I believe in evolution. Things change.

I believe in quarks, and it fills me with joy just to think about their existence.

I believe God is a scientist. I believe He can control the processes of creation, wind, water - but most likely uses the same scientific principles we are discovering and many we haven't figured out yet.

I believe God is a poet. I believe He uses metaphor, simile, meter and other linguistic arts we are discovering and many we haven't figured out yet.

I believe in Christ, a Savior for mankind. I am comfortable talking about Him from a variety of perspectives: great teacher, radical thinker, future Messiah.

I believe that a boy named Joseph Smith, who never claimed to be perfect, did ask a humble and profound question in a grove which then became sacred.

I believe in your right not to believe me. 

I believe that when an all-powerful, all-knowing, eternal being who can create universes and manage black holes communicates with His distracted, opinionated, earth-centric children some things get lost in the translation.

I believe that belief is a process of discovery, a journey and that one of the best metaphors I have heard to describe it is The Blind Man and the Elephant. As we each explore and learn, it can seem that we are talking about completely different truths. As we share we may find that our beliefs fit together in surprising ways.